There was this man who had fallen madly in love with Texas. She was of a thin, fragile disposition, with eyes bluer than the brightest bluebonnet that state could offer. Yet, Texas believed she was obese beyond all belief. When she looked into the mirror she saw not her bony arms and shoulders, but part of her cheek and possibly the meat of her neck. When they made love she was gentle enough to avoid squishing the man, and all his manliness. The man tried everything to get the girl to eat, but she insisted upon her girth, and locked her self in her room on the second floor above the bakery. "I'll not come out love. Never!" The man, we will call him Comrade Kraken was bewildered by her delusion. He took action. First, he purchased a gigantic mirror and reclined it in her bedroom, but with more reflection, she saw only more of herself. "I am bloated", she covered her face, and laid back in her bed. Second, Comrade devised a plan to have a seamstress come a measure her. 
No one is beyond logic, and measurements. When the seamstress appeared with her tape measure in hand Texas hollered, "Leave or I will crush you with my weight." Texas hopped on her hands and feet and called like a crow. When Comrade Kraken gave the seamstress the okay nod, the seamstress set to work. Texas warned her once more before rolling over on her. Eventually, and bewildered the seamstress gave up her suit. Comrade Kraken was ready to give up."I may never leave this room, dearest" She replied, "For I cannot fit through that door." Texas pointed.
Comrade Kraken, fed up with her tomfoolery, attempted to drag her out by her tiny arm, but instead was met with a sharp pair of teeth. That next morning I found the dear Comrade on a ladder with a pick and hammer. He sawed off the top of his house, until all that was left was his tiny Texas, and her tiny bed. When he called her, she refused. She was too big, she said, for the ladder.
"If I fall, I pray I will crush the earth's plate of molten magma, and it will be the end of us all." Texas pleaded with the man to let her remain above. The more Texas pleaded the more, Comrade Kraken pleaded.
"I will catch you I promise." The good Comrade spoke.
Again Texas refused him.
"But if you do not come down now, I fear the house will collapse, and you will plummet into the Earth's core."
Just then Texas could hear the house creaking beneath her feet. It rumbled, and for fear she might crush the earth below, she leaped into the empty air below.
She leaped into his arms.
Unfortunately, the ground below the good comrade's feet collapsed, and they plummeted into the earth's core.
In the Shitsburgh, Texas is the End of the world.
